Guilty, Lazy Bum?

Roswell, Georgia Premier Personal Training.   The She Side of Fit2DMax:  Introducing Journeys of Danay!

Guilty, Lazy Bum?

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Looking down at this growing belly of mine, my mind fills with wonder at this miraculous truth.  My body is this little precious one’s home for now, as the Creator weaves our baby’s tiny heart together within me. It is almost too much for my mind to fathom. All of this is still so new, and is such an unknown and massive space to shuttle out into. I sit back and let the word take flight before me.  Motherhood.  I have no idea what to expect, and I have no idea what this will feel like.

 

 

The eyes of my soul are wide open and filled with excitement. The two eyes planted in this square shaped head of mine however, are half closed, droopy, and wanting to see the back of my eyelids about…ninety-seven percent of the time. They warned me that I would be tired, but not daily overdose on night time benadryl kind of tired.  Everyday I set off with my semi-satisfying cup of decaf tea, and head to work. The office feels more like a jail cell these days, keeping me away from the coveted world of sleep.  I sit in my cell and try my best to be productive, as my heavy eyelids and my brain battle throughout the day over who will reign supreme.  After this grueling day of war I sleepily drag myself home to my wonderful, loving, fitness expert husband, who’s very presence reminds me of the importance of working out. With one eyebrow raised and lips twisted I think to myself, “work out who?” Not I.  No thank you. Let me just find my way over this mountain of eight stairs that stand between myself and the open arms of my dearly beloved comforter and down pillows, whom I’ve longed for all day. Victory. I smile as I lay back into my day’s finish line. Ah yes… right now, these are the moments I live for. This, my day’s relief and joy.

 

 

Two and a half months of this go by, and although justified in my fatigue, a wave of guilt has swept over me. I feel lazy, and I feel like a bum. There is this inner voice within me that says you should be able to master this, mind over matter, get up. Maybe it’s the side effect of being a Marine’s daughter. My father made sure to make me aware of the fact, that “pain is weakness leaving your body.” So with my pride and my tired eyes in tow, I whipped out some work out clothes that hardly fit any longer, and I geared up to have my first pregnancy workout. I proceeded to have the worst, most horrid and deflating workout of my life. I have come to the conclusion, that maybe it’s not the wisest idea to try and pull off a workout from a place of complete exhaustion. Pregnancy exhaustion to be more precise. While some women may be able to glide through first trimester workouts victoriously with ease, I…am not that one. Can I get a witness? Lazy bum I am not. First time pregnant woman I am. I’ll just take this journey one day at a time. My hope lies in the stories I’ve heard of energetic second trimesters. Tennis shoes and spandex pants, I will see you then.

 

Sincerely,

Hoping in second trimester

 

3 replies
    • Fit2DMax
      Fit2DMax says:

      Yes ma’am, hopefully good surprises 🙂 And journey’s are most fulfilling when shared with lovely people. It’s my privilege to share.

      Reply

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